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| Thoughts from my quiet time with Isaiah 34:1 I am Redeemed...mistakes and all...I am His! |
To do that, we must first remove the masks, strip away the images, tear down the walls, give up false identities, expose our real fears, shed other people's perception of us and most importantly, stop with the fakeness. Is that a word? I've been with my husband so long that I, too, have started creating words. Oh well. You get the point. :-)
On my journey, I've learned that self discovery involves two things:
1) acceptance of who you truly are;
2) acceptance of where you truly are.
Guess what? Who you are is actually the easy part! As women, we struggle with this when we are disconnected from the true source of our identity. There is only one place to find it, but when you are disconnected, you'll look AND find your identity in all sorts of places: men, MEN, mennnnnn...hey did I say men???... children, career titles, ministry titles...you name it. There is no end to the list of people, places & things that attempt to define women, womanhood, beauty, femininity, etc.
But the surest and safest place to find out who you are is with the one who created you. You are His. He has redeemed you. Mistakes and all, He has redeemed you and called you by name. You are important to Him. The things you care about are important to Him. Don't believe me? Just ask Him. Sometimes, it can seem as if He is not listening or that He has somehow fallen asleep on your journey, but I assure you, He is well aware and you are not forgotten.
Another important aspect of discovering who you are is developing a high level of self-awareness. We must become so acquainted and accepting of where we truly are that we are honest and unafraid to expose our truth to a trusted friend and accountability partner. You need courage to admit where you are versus where you'd like to be or where you like people to think you are.
The only person we deceive when we are not honest is ourselves. Our truths play out in how we behave and are easily observable by others. We only successfully hide them from ourselves.
Have you ever thought you had grown in an area only to find out you had not when faced with a situation that showed you differently? I certainly have. It's not pleasant.
The last part of self-awareness is the fun part! Discovering your special and unique skills, talents, abilities, likes, dislikes, & preferences, and choosing to accept and engage them regularly. If you don't know what these are yet, that's okay. Find a friend that you trust to be completely honest with you and then ask them these three questions:
Personally, working in the corporate world, I have had the opportunity to take several assessments that have helped uncover my personality, work/life style and other preferences. Some examples of helpful assessments are Myers-Briggs, DiSC and How to Fascinate. While, all of these things are geared towards helping professionals become self aware, they have helped me to increase my self-awareness in my overall lifestyle because they enhance your ability to become comfortable with yourself and your style as well as give you pointers for adapting your style where necessary to interact with others. There is no greater place to use this knowledge that HOME!
Here are a few things that I've discovered about myself:
The only person we deceive when we are not honest is ourselves. Our truths play out in how we behave and are easily observable by others. We only successfully hide them from ourselves.
Have you ever thought you had grown in an area only to find out you had not when faced with a situation that showed you differently? I certainly have. It's not pleasant.
The last part of self-awareness is the fun part! Discovering your special and unique skills, talents, abilities, likes, dislikes, & preferences, and choosing to accept and engage them regularly. If you don't know what these are yet, that's okay. Find a friend that you trust to be completely honest with you and then ask them these three questions:
- Describe 3 things that are unique about me?
- In what ways do I add value to our relationship?
- What are the things that I do well?
You should see some overlap in these answers. This is not the end all of who you are, but its a good first step towards uncovering the things that are special about you. Once you do that, write down three ways that you will celebrate and engage those things on a weekly basis.
Personally, working in the corporate world, I have had the opportunity to take several assessments that have helped uncover my personality, work/life style and other preferences. Some examples of helpful assessments are Myers-Briggs, DiSC and How to Fascinate. While, all of these things are geared towards helping professionals become self aware, they have helped me to increase my self-awareness in my overall lifestyle because they enhance your ability to become comfortable with yourself and your style as well as give you pointers for adapting your style where necessary to interact with others. There is no greater place to use this knowledge that HOME!
Here are a few things that I've discovered about myself:
- I'm introverted.
- I'm objective & analytical.
- I love coaching & mentoring.
- I prefer staying home with my husband vs going out.
- I prefer spending time with 1 or 2 friends vs a crowd.
- I prefer a simple look for fashion, accessories & makeup.
- I'm a planner who does not like interruptions to my carefully planned schedule. I'm okay with spontaneity but only when planned ahead of time. :-)
Once I learned these things about myself, do you know what I discovered? I like ME! I both like myself the way I am today, and I'm excited to meet the new and improved me that I will become tomorrow and the next day. It's so exciting! I'm enjoying this journey of self discovery! It's hilarious at times to look back over my process and think to myself: "wow did I really do that? did I wear that? did I say that?" Then I shake my head, laugh at myself and keep it moving! No time to waste on the past except to learn from it. The more I learn about myself, the more free I become. The more free I become, the less I invest in the perceptions of others as a source of definition for myself.
So, since HE has called me by name, this is who I am. Hi! My name is Nicole Dawson.
What's YOUR name?
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