Emotional Intoxication

in•tox•i•ca•tion
1. inebriation; drunkenness.
2. an act or instance of intoxicating.
3. overpowering exhilaration or excitement of the mind or emotions.

Me: Did I REALLY do that?
Myself: Yep. I did.
I: {sigh} Some day I'm going to get these emotions under control.

So goes the conversation that I have with myself after sobering up from an extreme emotional overdose. I'm talking about those times when I'm so consumed with how something feels (good or bad) that I just let go and do/say WHATEVER I feel in the moment. Then afterwards, I have one of those "morning after" moments from the past when I would wake up from a drunken sleep only to face what I did the night before. Can you relate? :-)

It is a very similar case for many of us and our emotions. If we are not careful, we can allow ourselves to be so overtaken by how we feel that we become intoxicated with the raw emotions and let go of control. Notice I didn't say "lose control" as if we have no power over the matter. We CHOOSE to let go. And I dont know about you, but back in the day, I did and said alot of things while intoxicated that I later regretted. But in the moment, because of how it felt, I didn't care or even consider what the consequences would be. And the more I allowed myself to become intoxicated, the lower my inhibititons would fall and the more reckless my words or actions became. The same is true of our emotions.

Without the proper self control powered by the Holy Spirit, any situation (or person) that has the ability to "touch" your emotions also has the power to intoxicate you if you allow yourself to focus too much on how it feels. And nothing makes me cringe with embarrassment more than remembering an emotion-laced decision. Whether it was words spoken harshly & carelessly in the heat of the moment, a dude that I found myself caught up with because "he made me feel beautiful" or money spent on something frivilous knowing I had bills to pay. In every case, it was my responsibility to control my behavior, and where I failed, there was only myself to blame. Several times I've tried to blame someone else for my lack of self-control. I mean surely if my husband wouldn't push my buttons I wouldn't lose it right??? Surely if that dude leaves you alone, you can leave him alone right?? Wrong and wrong!! Ugh. Oh yes...I feel you.

So I've been on this journey of learning and practicing emotional self-control.  Will you join me?  In doing so, I've had to start with admitting certain truths about my emotional disposition. I thought I'd share them with you in the hopes that they will help in your personal quest to conquer the emotional beast within. :-)

1. My emotions are stronger than I think.
2. My emotions distort my ability to accurately assess a situation.
3. My emotions are not all bad.
4. My emotions are not all good.
5. How I feel is not always how things truly are. Just because I feel it does not make it true.
6. How I feel is not always a result of what is going on immediately in front of me. Sometimes my past experiences influence how I feel about the current situation.
7. My emotions are overwhelmingly convincing yet overwhelmingly deceptive.
8. I always regret emotional decisions.
9. It's my responsibility to exercise self control in the face of high emotion situations. I need to stop blaming others. It's ME!
10. If I fail to exercise self control, it is my fault and no one else's.
11. Now matter how it feels, I always have a choice.
12. God is powerful enough to keep me when my emotions threaten to take over. But He will not fight me for contraol. I have to let Him have control over my emotions.
13. Controlling my emotions takes practice.
14. God will give me PLENTY of opportunities to practice.
15. I can't always control how I feel but I can control how I respond to what I feel.
16. Getting someone else's input is valuable in separating truth from feelings. A close friend can help you make the distinction between what is really true versus what is really a matter of how you feel.
17. When my emotions are provoked it literally feels like I am trying to control an F5 tornado inside of me just begging to cause destruction
18. God gave me emotions for a reason. To nurture, care, comfort and nourish others. Not to destroy them or myself.
19. Without a strong relationship with God and the leading of the Holy Spirit my emotions will destroy my life.
20. I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me, including and especially controlling my emotions.

Proverbs 25:28 

Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control.